Comments for The Daddy Diaries

Comment on below the surface by jdoh

jdoh — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 13:32:27 +0000

Your last sentence says it all. Someone needs to make a decision and they need to do it now. T cannot wait for permanence any longer.

Almost a month ago today… We were dreading another court date during which nothing much would happen. Then, much to our surprise and relief our daughter was freed for adoption.

Successes do happen. I hope that T is one of the success stories too.

You are doing an amazing job.

Comment on below the surface by Knot

Knot — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:39:20 +0000

First, let me just say congratulations on your new baby! I’m sincerely happy for you both.

I can completely relate to this most recent post. Our girl was too young to say the words. But, her actions said everything every time she sat up, eyes wide, barely able to contain her excitement when she saw her mother. It was really hard to take. I had the exact same thoughts – well, of course she likes her! She’s a fun playmate that she gets to see for an hour a day, and all the attention is on her. What’s not to like about that?

As time went on, and they increased the visits in number and duration, leading on to unsupervised, then overnights, then multiple overnights, that excitement didn’t subside. She’d come back angry at us and behave so badly. That was all we ever got to see in the end was the mad, angry girl who hit, spit and kicked. And, yet, whenever we dropped her off, there was that happy girl again. After awhile, the connection between the two of them was rather undeniable. In the end, we just have had to wrap our minds around the idea that she was never ours. Even if that was what we signed on for.

I’m still holding out hope for you two. I want to see someone have success at this so that I don’t feel like our system is completely failing these children. I know what it feels like to just want it to be over one way or another. The uncertainty is absolutely unbearable. My thoughts are with you.

Comment on below the surface by EG

EG — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:40:06 +0000

Oh, I wish I had some words for you. Or better – a solution for you. I wish we could all petition on your behalf.

Comment on five o’clock by EG

EG — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:36:34 +0000

Oh phew. 30 days is a long time.

Comment on five o’clock by Julie

Julie — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:26:31 +0000

Congratulations to your whole family!

Comment on five o’clock by felicia

felicia — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 20:45:16 +0000

I am so happy for you guys! Lucas is so handsome. I hope you guys have awesome adventures together!

Comment on five o’clock by Clementine

Clementine — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:12:00 +0000

My thoughts and prayers are with your family. Peace to all of you!

Comment on below the surface by Kay

Kay — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 17:31:55 +0000

That sounds like it was really hard. You handled it pretty well, though, all told. Toddlers don’t know what they’re saying. Think of all the mothers who LOSE THEIR SHIT the first time their kid says something knowingly hurtful. It’s hard. But it doesn’t mean anything, and you know that, too.

It’s refreshing to see someone be so honest about having a less-than-perfect exchange with their child. So, thank you, again, for being you.

I empathize with your desire to end the uncertainty. You’re holding up admirably. As much as you can, try to remind yourself of how WELL you’re doing. And then punch a pillow or five and imagine the bureaucracy demon being banished to a dark dungeon.

Anyway… hang in there. You’re doing great.

Comment on five o’clock by Melissa

Melissa — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 14:48:20 +0000

Congratulations to you all! He’s adorable! Give him lots of smooches.

Comment on five o’clock by jdoh

jdoh — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 13:33:06 +0000

Words cannot express how overjoyed I am for you all.

Your son’s mother gave him an incredible gift.

Enjoy the peace that comes with “forever”!